The Chicago Tribune asked an interesting question the other day: can it ever be a good idea to remarry your ex?
Of course, after reading this blog, one might wonder if it is ever a good idea to marry at all. Or even, what legal considerations come along with reuniting, even if it does feel so good?
We can't answer the first question. No one really can, other than you and your ex-spouse. What was the cause of the divorce? Is there still love there? Can you now communicate well enough to get past those problems? Each marriage and divorce is different. See a shrink if you are unsure about your prospects.
What we can address are the legal considerations of working your way back to marriage.
You were married. Then, you were divorced. One of you probably was killed financially in the divorce. You may have even been forced to pay spousal support. But, it's only money right? Plus, according to a study cited by the Tribune, 72 percent of those who reunite stay together.
Even still, we'd always recommend a prenuptial agreement, regardless of whether it's the first shot or you are a repeat offender. Learn from the financial lessons of failures past. A prenup will ensure that the rebuilding post-divorce isn't wiped out should a second divorce happen.
If you are relying financially on an ex-spouse, note that any subsequent nuptials, to that spouse or another, will end the right to spousal support. If your ex-spouse is smart enough to get a prenuptial agreement that limits spousal support after the next divorce, you might end up twice dumped and living on scraps.
Conversely, if you've been forking over monthly amounts to your ex-spouse, and the court order is about to expire, note that marriage will not only mean you'll be supporting them while remarried, but if you divorce again, you may end up lengthening the time you'll be breadwinning (or breadlosing). A prenuptial agreement might be able to limit the risk of second divorce spousal support.
Be sure that this time is different before remarrying your ex.
- Consult a Chicago Family Law Attorney (FindLaw)
- Reduce the Impact of Divorce on Children (FindLaw's Knowledge Base)
- How Divorce Can Actually Benefit Children (FindLaw's Knowledge Base)
- 5 Tips for Limiting Effects of Divorce on Families on Christmas (FindLaw's Chicago Family Law Blog)